I almost bought a magazine today. I was standing in the grocery store checkout line, waiting patiently for my turn to load my buggy of groceries onto the conveyor belt. I noticed the magazine rack which stood beside the checkout line. Immediately I saw it. A magazine banner headline that screamed at me, flashing glimpses of the highly relevant story that was embedded deep within the glossy pages. It was written for ME. A topic that I had been recently considering—something that I had vowed to research to see if it would help me improve my quality of life. And, believe it or not, sitting right beside it was another magazine boasting of the insider’s story and the real dirt on the actors and production set of the most recent streaming show which I had just finished watching. How did the magazine editors know that I cared deeply about those characters? With a quick glance around the magazine rack, I saw other magazines with less interesting stories advertised in large print fonts. Nothing else captured my interest there. I could ignore those other magazines.
I turned by attention back to exhibit 1 and exhibit 2. I started to reach out to grab one or both magazines, but then I stopped myself. Nobody buys magazines anymore. I thought of the hundreds of magazines that I had recently cleaned out of my parents’ house. Good Housekeeping, Ladies Home Journal, Birds & Blooms, Christianity Today, Readers Digest, Popular Mechanics, Scrapbooking, Popular Science, Games, The New Yorker, Time, Better Homes and Gardens, Rocks & Gems, National Geographic. Artists Magazine, Sky & Telescope, Southern Living, Crafters, TV Guide, Life, and more. My parents subscribed to a lot of magazines. As I stood in the checkout line, I quickly thought that I could probably search online for the information that was hidden inside the pages of the magazines. And, at $15 per magazine, I might want to spend that money differently. So, I didn’t buy either magazine. But, I glanced one last time at the shiny covers with the tempting lead articles. I hoped I wasn’t making a mistake by leaving the answers to all my questions behind on the rack.
There was a small newsstand in the town where I grew up. When I was a young, my dad started a tradition of taking my sister and I to the newsstand after church. Every few weeks, while my mom toiled in the kitchen preparing Sunday lunch, he would take us down to the newsstand. He usually bought a “big city” newspaper so he could see how the news sounded from other parts of the country. That sounded pretty boring to me. My sister and I wandered in the tiny store, feasting our eyes on the plethora of magazines which were trying to catch our attention. When I was a youngster, I gravitated towards the comic books. I liked Archie and the gang from Riverdale before they were cool. I liked the campy Batman and Robin of the 1960s, whose goofy antics contrast sharply with the dark serious Batman of the 2000s. Spiderman, the Fantastic Four, Superman, Disney comics—there was always something new and interesting to buy. As I grew, my interests changed. Entering the teen years, I set my sights on Teen Beat, 16 Magazine, and Tiger Beat, where I read about The Partridge Family, Donny Osmond, and The Monkees. I was in-the-know on all the celebrities because of my trips to the local newsstand.
Here are some of my Batman and Robin trading cards from the old newsstand.
In the 1990s, when my kids were young, we took long car trips several times a year. Grandparents lived far away, an 8 or 12 hour trip. For many years, there were no handheld electronics for the car. No entertainment devises. My kids got bored. I usually tried to prep the backseat by stocking it with things to do. I always provided each kid with a new magazine tailored to their interests. Sometimes they were able to pick the magazine themselves, sometimes I had to pick it out on a mom-run to the grocery store. The magazines were always a big hit, keeping the kids entertained as the miles melted away.
I had another trick up my sleeve for long car rides, just so you know. The bag of money. At the start of our trip, I gave each kid a Ziploc bag with several dollars in quarters. In the front seat, I had rolls of quarters ready to disperse. As each hour ticked by, I evaluated how well the last hour had gone. If the kids had gotten along reasonably well, each kid got paid one or two quarters. If, on the other hand, someone was ugly or grumpy or complaining or downright nasty, that kid didn’t get any money. He or she could set things straight for the next hour and try to get back on the next payroll. I doled out money at 1:00, 2:00, 3:00, etc., always at the top of the hour. The kids usually got paid, but there were notable times where one of them missed out due to bad behavior. At our destination, the kids would use their spending money for fun arcade games and ice cream stands and other activities, so the bag of money was a great incentive.
Nowadays, I’m one of those people who still likes to handle books. I like to turn the pages and feel the textures. I can’t, though, bring myself to look at a newspaper. And, I seem to have lost interest in magazines, too. I wonder how many magazines are sold every day. I wonder who is buying them. I wonder how satisfied the writers and editors and other magazine employees feel about the fruits of their labors. And, how secure they feel about their jobs. Will there be magazines on the grocery shelves in 20 years? In 10 years? In 5 years?
I think of everyday things that have all but disappeared in my lifetime. Phone books. VCRs. Checkbooks. Landline phones. Camera film. Photo Albums. Address books. Carbon paper. Travelers Checks. Pay Phones. The list goes on and on. What else will be added to the list? Any predictions of what else will become obsolete as the years go by?
According to the site magazineline.com, the most popular magazine in 2021 was AARP The Magazine, with 36,916,000 readers. I can’t verify those numbers, but, does it surprise anyone that the most read magazine is one that is designed for people over the age of 50? The American Association of Retired Persons. Those are the people who grew up reading magazines; the people who continue to read magazines. Maybe they can keep the industry alive and well. Maybe their purchasing power will pay off.
Maybe I will march right back to the grocery store and get myself a shiny colorful magazine so that I can find out the real story. I can Get The Inside Scoop, Improve My Life, Hear From A Fashion Expert, Read Inspiring Stories, Improve My Knowledge, Get Healthy, Expand My World, Improve My Love Life, Get New Perspective, Learn About My Favorite Celebrity, and Hear News That I Can Use.
All that information is hiding behind the glossy cover. Why wouldn’t I want to buy a magazine?? Maybe I should.
I’ll let you read it when I’m finished, k?