Do It Right

Imma start a fight in my own household. Or a disagreement. Or an argument about why I would bring this up; what’s the point? Or at least a big sigh and a head-shaking, There she goes again. But, I feel like you, my readers, deserve to have this aired. I feel certain that households around the world struggle with similar situations. And they need someone bold enough to address it head-on. So that family members might come to some resolution, or, at least, learn to accept things that will never change. I’m not sure that I can do that—accept things that will never change, I mean. But, maybe there’s hope for me to ease up a little. Maybe I can grow as a person. I don’t know, maybe. Articulating the problem might set me on the path of acceptance.

Today I walked into the kitchen to put my (used) tea mug in the (dirty) dishwasher. This is what I saw when I opened the door to the dishwasher.  One look at dish placement and maybe your reaction is, “OK….so?” Or maybe your reaction, like me, is “Oh good grief. Seriously??”

I don’t know which white dish was first to go into the dishwasher rack. But, I cannot in any way, shape, or form understand why the second white dish was put in its spot like that. So haphazardly. All willy-nilly. With such little regard for dish alignment which maximizes available space. I mean, a dishwasher, by design, allows for precise nesting of dishes and bowls to allow space for many configurations of dirty dishes, where everything gets clean. Look again at the dishes. The space between left dish and right dish is so limiting. Almost assuredly the only thing that will fit between those two would be 3 of the exact or mostly similar types of plates. Nothing else would fit. What if you needed to load differently sized dishes? Could they be squeezed in between the white dishes? I think not. How constricting. How restrictive.

Looking closer, let’s assume for a minute that the left dish was loaded first, like this…

Wouldn’t it make much more sense to load the second dish nearby, like this?

Look at all that empty space that could accommodate any number of dishes of any shape and size. You get that, right?

Or, say that the right dish was loaded first in the rack over here, like this….

Can’t we all agree that the best place for the second dish would be here, nestled against it?

Again, tons of empty room for any kind of dish that needs to be cleaned. No wasted space.

Did I seriously take time out of my day to re-stage these dishes in different positions so that I could photograph them? Yes, my friend, I did. Anything for the story. But, why am I nit-picking about this? Because, really, I just cannot understand. I don’t know how anyone would look at a single white dish in the dishwasher and NOT understand how a dishwasher rack was designed. It’s like if someone put one shoe on their foot and then, instead of following suit with the other shoe, they put it on their hand. How could they think that would work?  Or, if driving up to a line of cars, instead of pulling in behind the last car in an orderly way, they pulled in perpendicularly, at a completely different angle. It makes no sense. How can they NOT see what is blatantly obvious when it’s staring them in the face?? Why wouldn’t a person just fall in line and load dishes in the manner that had already begun?

I’m sure you are muttering words under your breath as you read this. Words that are not complementary to me. Well, first you must realize that this kind of thing happens All. The. Time. Dishes placed in odd, random order, cluttering the dishwasher and leaving little space for others. To defend myself, I do a bang-up job of squeezing every little dirty dish into an already jam-packed dishwasher. It’s one of my talents. So, I am particularly sensitive to poor (abysmal) dishwasher loading. To keep the family peace, I have tried to temper myself and my urge to reload the dishwasher the RIGHT way. But, finding today’s dish scene made me pause and wonder WHY does this always happen? And, consequently, to ask my family members the question: Can you NOT SEE the obvious patterns for loading dishes? Or do you just NOT CARE?

After all, who really cares about all of this, anyway? What's the big deal? I guess that over the years, juggling my roles as mom, house organizer, efficiency expert, and time manager, mixed with the constant constraints of financial concerns, and merged with my slight OCD and my logical space and time awareness tendencies has turned me into a Dishwasher Czar. Get the most out of the appliance with the least amount of work at the lowest cost. Controlling? OK, maybe. I don’t really apologize for it, but I understand that’s it’s a little over-the-top for most people. Sorry, not sorry. But, again, how can you expect to get a whole day's load of dirty dishes in there if you don't maximize the space? It's just common sense.

I will acknowledge that this is a first world problem, and of little consequence to most people. I know that. But, the way I see it, if we have a resource of convenience, shouldn't we optimize its use? At the risk of sounding petty or snippy. I mean, nobody wants to hear, "Let me show you how to do it." But, in this case, "Here, let me show you how to do it."

What about you? Dishwasher aside, is there something that you have a slight (or stronger) obsession about? And, other people don’t fulfill your expectations? That you always know that you can do it better, the RIGHT way?

Or, are you the person who refuses to comply? Do you see what is expected and choose to do otherwise, just because you can? Flatly ignoring the suggested mode of operation.

Or, are you the person who has no idea what I am even talking about? It has never occurred to you to follow the guidelines. Heck, you didn’t even know there WERE guidelines. What difference does it make and why would it matter, anyway?

Or, are you the person who designed dishwasher racks, sending them out into the world optimistically, but blindly, assuming that everyone would use and appreciate your efforts for structure and versatility? Not realizing that so many people would completely ignore what you so carefully planned.

Haha, what a silly blog. Let’s hope it doesn’t blow things up in my house. I fully realize that I might hereafter be assigned all dishwasher loading and unloading chores in perpetuity. That’s the risk of pointing out that everyone else is doing it wrong. Fine -- you can do it yourself!

But, at least, I know the RIGHT way to do it. Even if I have to suppress my compulsion to correct the fumbling dishwasher loaders who are oblivious to their sins.

And, more importantly, I was able to use the phrase ‘in perpetuity’ in a sentence, which had been a goal of mine for a while now.