I have a sad story to share. I know that you’ll think I’m messing with you, that I’ll pretend that it’s a sad story, when really it’s a funny story. But that’s not the case. This really is a sad story. When it happened, I felt awful. And when I think about it now, I still feel awful. I guess I’m sharing it with you to share some of my misery, and maybe to learn a thing or two. My sad tale happened a couple of years ago when I was driving my car.
I was leaving my neighborhood, taking a routine route, turning down short stretches of streets, on the way to pick my daughter up from an afterschool practice. I noticed ahead on the street, there was a tiny, excited little bird hopping on the road. I noticed him because he was doing a little bird dance on the far side of the road, staying in one area, hopping to the left, then the right, then the left, then the right. I started laughing as I got closer to him, because he was clearly enjoying himself and dancing rhythmically, Left, Right, Left, Right, Left, Right. I knew that my car would pass closely to him, but he wasn’t afraid, and he continued his happy cadence as I drove closer. I quietly said “Hello Little Bird” as my car approached his little stage. To my horror, the little guy suddenly broke cadence just as my car reached him. Instead of hopping Left, Right, Left, Right, he suddenly hopped Left, Right, Right—right into the path of my car. With no time to react, I gasped, and then immediately looked into my rear-view mirror. Behind me, it was clear that the little bird had been smushed, and I felt terrible. To make matters even worse, I saw, in the mirror, a flock of about 8 other similar looking birds immediately swoop down to the tragic spot on the road and stand in a circle around it, nervously shifting weight on their skinny little legs. His family, I guess. I could hardly drive, I felt so guilty and remorseful.
Some story, huh? It's a lot, I know. Since I tend to analyze stuff, I’ll pull out a few things to talk about.
First, I think what hit me so hard was the fact that the little bird had personality, and he was clearly enjoying himself. I think what a great day he must have been having before I came along. Sometimes, I think, tragedy feels worse when it interrupts a happy positive event. When someone is on a natural high during an exciting time, and they are struck with tragedy, the fall in emotion is so extreme, it boggles the mind. I think, in my story, if the bird was just a random bird that I accidently ran over, I would have felt a great big OH NO!, but I wouldn’t have taken it so personally. The fact that he was partying, and I crushed him….that was hard to take.
Secondly, while I know that my car is a big monstrous powerful machine, I was actually shocked at the remains left behind, or lack of remains, as it were. I would have expected to see something similar to the cartoon steamroller that flattens everything it encounters. But, in this case, all I could see was a small colored spot. There was absolutely nothing left of the little bird. While I respect the power of the car, I had no idea it could cause damage to that degree. I wondered what my car would do to other living things if our paths accidently crossed. It scared me.
Thirdly, I didn’t mean to do it. But, I couldn’t take it back. Accidents happen. Some accidents are completely out of our control. This one, I think, was out of my control; but then again, I was driving the car, and I did run over the bird. Maybe I could have driven more slowly or cautiously. Maybe I could have honked my horn to shoo the little bird away. But, the bottom line was that I caused the accident. It was very bad luck, and I did feel responsible. It was my fault.
Fourthly, his family. How could I explain to them, apologize to them? Obviously, I am projecting human qualities and emotions on these birds, but I’m telling you, they did gather around his final resting place as I drove away. What were they thinking?
Fifthly, the problems that we cause can weigh heavily on us and others. When our actions cause pain, we need to do our best to apologize and make amends. We might need to ask forgiveness from the ones we have harmed, from God, and from ourselves. If we don't, the pain could last even longer and cause more damage.
A few minutes after the incident, I had collected my daughter from her afterschool practice, and I was returning home. I drove around the block to come through a different entrance to the neighborhood. I could not face the scene of the crime so soon. For the next few days, I avoided the street as much as I could. Eventually, I was able to move on and drive normally through my neighborhood. Now, I pass the dreaded location multiple times a day. But, I still feel angst when I think about the incident.
And the killer is......
Miss Gwen 
In the Street 
With the Car
(extra credit if you know which board game you just won)
I feel so sad for the little bird, and I want to apologize to him. I’m so sorry. I will try to be much more careful in the future. Thanks for listening. Sometimes it helps to talk things out.