Are you one who likes to stick with something come Hell or Highwater? Do you make a decision, then hunker down to see it through, no matter what? Do you Stick With It? Or, do you sometimes reevaluate your decision, change your course of action, and maybe just Let It Go? I've been known to fiercely push my agenda. Get On Board, or Get Out Of The Way. But, I have also been known to pivot and reevaluate my original plan. I suspect you are like me and find yourself doing a little of both, at times, insisting that something has to be done with a specific result, and at other times, changing your mind and letting things fall into place differently. When it becomes clear that your original idea might be completely off-base, do you have the guts to admit that you need to change course? When you face difficult obstacles, are you likely to stay the course? How do we decide when to Stick With It or when to Let It Go?
There are definitely topics that we each feel strongly about, and rightly so. I think it is wise to make sure that we Stick With It when we believe that it is the best decision. I think it’s not as admirable if we Stick With It simply because we want to win. As humans, there is a strong drive to keep ourselves from admitting that we were wrong, or admitting defeat, or losing. We don’t want to be labeled as misguided or admit that our ideas were not the best. We will often do anything to keep from losing. Sometimes it’s the right call, to see it thru, no matter how difficult. Sometimes, though, we Stick With It just because we want to experience the thrill of victory.
We have a daughter who will not Let It Go. When she feels strongly, she is relentless in pushing for something to be done. She will wear me down, until finally, the situation plays out like every Perry Mason courtroom scene on the old TV drama. Perry Mason, the relentless lawyer who attacked confident witnesses under oath so ruthlessly that they finally spilled the beans and confessed that it was true—they had committed the crime, not the defendant. Cue the dramatic reveal music. I know the feeling of being targeted and pressed again and again, and with every pick, pick, pick, it wears me down, until I finally break, saying “OK, OK, whatever you say. You’re right-- I DID murder the secretary. Just stop coming at me!” Well, actually, I say something more like, “Ok, ok, we’ll do it your way. Just give me some peace.” Although we strongly suggested that this determined family member would have an excellent career as a prosecuting attorney, that does not appear to be the career path she has chosen. She will have to use that bulldog temperament for other good works.
Let me steer off in another direction here for a minute, because I have to tell you a side story which is barely related to the theme of Let It Go. Back in the 2010’s the Disney movie Frozen came out and immediately became a huge hit. Our kids were older, so our family did not get sucked into the Frozen hype. But, because I teach preschool, I am always in the know about the latest buzz in the kinder world. I knew all about Elsa, and Anna, and Olaf. I knew the story. I knew the songs, the most famous being Elsa’s rousing anthem “Let It Go.” Around that time, Rob and I were at a local hangout spot and we ran into some neighbors, so we stopped to chat a while. Their young daughter was milling about with friends, and periodically popped over to our conversation. She and friends were engaged in a very active imitation of Elsa, et al.
When our neighbor commented on the whole Elsa thing, Rob was like, “Who?”. Then, the conversation went something like this:
- “You know.....Elsa.”
- “Who’s that?”
- “Elsa and Anna.”
- “Who are they?”
- "You know.....Frozen.”
- “What? What’s Frozen?”
Then, to stop the bleeding, I stuck my hand up in the air and said “Stop! HE DOESN’T KNOW!” What I meant to convey was that no matter how much you describe this movie, he will have no idea what you are talking about, because He Doesn’t Know. But, as things often take on a life of their own, I actually at that moment created a inside family joke that resurfaces over and over. It’s sometimes aimed at other family members, but often aimed at Rob, when we realize that he is not aware of a current fad or phrase or pop culture reference. In our experience, it's usually the dads who are most often in the dark. Imagine the town crier standing at attention, unrolling the sacred scroll, announcing in a loud commanding voice that the king is arriving. That’s the voice we use to call out “He Doesn’t Know!” when we realize that Rob (or sometimes someone else) does not know about the current topic of conversation. We get a lot of mileage out of that one. We should probably just Let It Go, but it's too much fun.
Let’s circle back around to the topic at hand.
There are so many choices in life to make every day. There are so many guiding principles to uphold and so many strong beliefs about policies and procedures. There are so many opportunities for people to stick to their guns or cave in. There are so many opportunities for people to compromise or change course. It’s enough to boggle the mind and confuse the soul.
Stick With It, or Let It Go? Would that we should have the wisdom to know. The best we can do is pray that we are on the right course, stop occasionally to review the other side of the coin, reassess, and adjust our course of action. Recalculating.... It is, I think, a big mistake to drive down one solitary road with blinders on, never looking side to side to gather more information along the way. It is a wise man or woman who can admit that they need to change course based on new information. It is a fool who believes the only way forward is the route that was established way back when, and nothing whatsoever can alter it. Mind you, that’s just my opinion.
Instead of getting too riled up about the current state of affairs, with all its controversy and arguing, I choose to push forward making the best decisions that I can, one by one. Do the next right thing. Keep an open mind and value everyone.
I’ll close with a parting thought about the state of our world. And, if you’re like Rob, He Doesn’t Know, this line is from Elsa’s song “Let It Go”, sung magnificently by Idina Menzel. Feel free to sing along--
Here I stand in the light of day
Let the storm rage on.....
The cold never bothered me anyway