Getting Caught

Do you remember a time when you got caught? Or you caught someone else? Ah-Hah! I see you!

You might think immediately of misbehavior in childhood. But, as adults, we too can be caught doing things -- some shameful, some ridiculous, some embarrassing, some illegal, some unethical.  Often, we think of 'bad' scenarios in which someone is caught. We all know how those go, and we hear of that stuff all the time.  Very few of those situations end up with happy endings, unless it’s the true story of Leonardo DiCaprio’s character Frank Abagnale being pursued by Tom Hank’s character Carl Hanratty in the movie Catch Me If You Can. Without spoiling the movie, I’ll just say that the crime/chase drama has a very satisfying ending. But, I’m not here to talk about catching someone who is doing something 'bad'.

Sometimes people get caught doing things that are kind or helpful. People try to be anonymous or lowkey, but someone finds out what they are doing.  I was thinking about some of those more cheerful circumstances--when someone was caught doing something productive and positive. A 'good' situation. In my first story, I caught the protagonist who was sneaking around trying to accomplish tasks without being detected. In my second story, I was the protagonist who was caught, because I failed miserably at my undercover task.

About 30 years ago, we moved into our house near Atlanta, Georgia. We knew we had made a wonderful decision to move here when we met the families in our new neighborhood. I would stack our neighborhood up against any neighborhood in the whole wide world. The people were that great, we made lifelong friendships, there was never a dull moment. The women in the neighborhood were organized and sponsored many activities throughout the year, some charitable, and some to build community within the neighborhood.

For a few years, our group enjoyed participating in a Secret Sister program. That might not be the name we used—that sounds more like sorority sisters. But, I can’t think of another name for it, so that’s what I’ll call it. The guidelines were simple—I secretly drew (out of a hat) the name of another woman in the neighborhood. As her Secret Sister, once a month, I would leave a seasonal holiday gift or treat at her house, at the mailbox, on the porch, or by the door.  The frivolity lasted for the entire year until Secret Sisters were revealed in December. As I ran around depositing gifts at the home of my target, I would also receive gifts from the person who had drawn my name, the person who was Secret Sister to me. If you’re not confused, then good for you.

In this particular year, I drew the name of a friend, whom I’ll call Pam. Pam was kind, funny, loud, and always ready to laugh. In January, I bought a small wintery gift that I wrapped up in a simple giftbag and secretly delivered to Pam’s house. I was excited the next day to see that my Secret Sister had also deposited a giftbag with a wintery gift at my house. In February, I bought a Valentine’s themed item, wrapped it in a giftbag, and left it at Pam’s mailbox. The next day, my Secret Sister gift arrived. I noticed that the giftbag looked very familiar. Hmmm, I think I recognize that giftbag. Having my suspicions raised, in March, I bought a very unique St. Patrick’s Day giftbag to use for my Secret Sister present. And, as if on cue, the day after I delivered the present to Pam, a gift was left at my mailbox in the very same St. Patrick’s Day giftbag.  The gig was up! I deduced that Pam and I had drawn each other’s names for the Secret Sister activity. I was giving gifts to her and she was giving gifts to me.

That’s when I decided to have fun with it. For the rest of the year I played tricks on her by using unusually large giftbags or oddly-shaped bags with her gift. Every single time, the bag re-appeared at my house the next day, carrying a thoughtful gift from Pam. Once, I waited until the very last minute, like the day before Halloween, to drop off her gift, just to see if she would panic and bring my gift earlier. Nope. Within hours of dropping hers off, my gift arrived packaged as expected. To her credit, she wasn’t regifting what I gave to her, she was just reusing the bag, saving pennies.  

At the end of the year, our group had a celebration to reveal our secrets. I can still picture Pam’s face as she read the card on her final gift, as the confusion covered her face, as she tried to make sense of my name being on the reveal card, as if someone had gotten things backwards, writing the wrong name in the wrong place. When I confronted her and verified that yes I was her Secret Sister, she shook her head saying, “But I was YOUR Secret Sister.” I nodded. As the truth set in, she screamed “WHAAAAAATTTTT????  I was waiting for my gift and re-using the giftbags!!” When I said, “I KNOW!!!”, she realized that she had been caught a long time ago. And she laughed and laughed, and cackled, and carried on, and told everyone within shouting distance all about it. It is one of my favorite memories of our dear late friend.

In that same general timeframe, I was caught in the act, or, more precisely caught because I didn’t act. Our kids were young, and we had out-of-town guests visiting. No one has ever fessed up, but I imagine jumping-on-the-bed-with-friends commotion was underway when my daughter came downstairs holding the baby tooth that had just come out. Methinks it was knocked out by a mid-air collision. Be that as it may, she proudly presented the tooth and asked what she should do with it. Going into full Mommy-mode, I told her that she should put it under her pillow at bedtime so that the Tooth Fairy would visit. And, that’s the last I thought about that tooth. What with friends being in town, sleeping bags and blow-up mattresses for kids, etc. A full house.

The next morning, my daughter came downstairs with tooth in hand. “The Tooth Fairy didn’t come.” “Oh crap!”, did NOT come out of my mouth. I slid into casual mode telling her that I had heard of something like that—when visitors were in the house, the Tooth Fairy sometimes waited because she was afraid she might get caught. Or something like that. My daughter seemed to buy it. So, on night #2, after our friends left, my daughter put the tooth under her pillow again. We tucked it in perfectly to make sure the Tooth Fairy would find it.  And that was the last I thought about that tooth. The next morning, my daughter came downstairs again with tooth in hand, “She still didn’t come.” “Double crap!” did NOT come out of my mouth. I convinced her to try one more time, and thankfully, the Tooth Fairy remembered to sneak into her room late in the night and exchange the tooth for money, with some added interest for good measure.  We didn’t have any further conversations about the Tooth Fairy, but my daughter surmised that the Tooth Fairy was just as forgetful as mom. I was caught, because of my lame attempts to keep up with the ruse.

I wonder who came up with the rules of Tooth Fairy, anyway? The whole idea of staying awake until your child is deeply asleep, running your hand everywhere under the pillow, trying desperately to find the tiny tooth without waking your child? I mean, could they make it any harder?? Thank goodness Elf on the Shelf wasn’t a thing when my kids were young. I never would have remembered to move that little sucker around the house every day. Getting caught because I failed as Tooth Fairy was unfortunate, but par for the course.

I do think there’s a lot of satisfaction in catching someone who is doing a ‘good’ thing. It’s fun to be in the know. To be one of the few who have the whole story. It makes you feel like a partner, in cahoots, keeping the secret safe from others.  And, if you are the one who is caught, it can be rewarding to have someone to whisper to, an ally, someone who shares your secret. Someone with whom you can plot and plan. Have you ever experienced either? Catching or being caught? 

Hold on.........Wait…..…Look here a minute.....…Something’s amiss….....You look like you’re hiding something…......What are you up to?..........I don’t know what it is, but I’m gonna keep my eye on you…...….I'm watching........You're 'bout to get caught..........Don’t make me sic the Tooth Fairy on YOU!!