Yawn.

You know that feeling when you….

…. have a new little baby, and it keeps you up all night?

…. have additional kids, and at least one of them seems to have this-or-that issue that interrupts your sleep?

…. have teenagers, and you always sleep with one ear open?

…. have pets, and that choking, heaving sound makes you jump out of bed faster than a speeding bullet?

You know that feeling when you….

…. interruptions notwithstanding, start to think that your inability to sleep isn’t always caused by outside factors, that perhaps it has to do with the way you are wired?

…. have family and roommates who remark on the voracity of your snoring?

…. have responsibilities and deadlines, and, more than once, a bright idea (that warrants extensive analysis) pops into your head at 3am, and the night is shot?

…. realize that the reason you’ve always taken a shower first thing in the morning is because it’s the only way you have any chance of waking up for the day?

You know that feeling when you….

….  always calculate when you will get an opportunity to rest your eyes during the day, and long for that moment to arrive?

You know that feeling when you….

…. finally decide you should investigate your sleep issues, so you make an appointment with the sleep doctor?

…. don’t know how to answer when the doctor asks you if you feel rested when you wake up, because you don’t know what ‘feeling rested’ means exactly, and you question whether you have ever ‘felt rested’?

…. have an overnight sleep study, which indicates not only do you have sleep apnea, but your body is rousing itself 10 times per hour, preventing you from falling into deep sleep?

You know that feeling when you….

…. get fitted with a customized sleep apnea mouthguard, which alters the position of your jaw to prevent obstructions and to open your airway at night?

…. spend weeks adjusting the mouthguard settings, cranking the hardware ever so slightly forward, trying to find the sweet spot to open your airway the perfect amount, hoping to facilitate an undisturbed night’s sleep?

…. find the sweet spot, and then continue to monitor your sleep patterns for the next 11 months by using an overnight snore app, which listens and regularly registers your sleep apnea/snoring nighttime interruptions at (thankfully) less than 20%, as was the goal, leading you to conclude that the sleep apnea mouthpiece is doing the trick?

You know that feeling when you….

…. suddenly, without explanation, start getting bad snore score readings, all-time highs of 70%, 80%, even 90% disturbances night after night after night, and you feel the consequences again of unsettled sleep?

…. after consultation with the sleep doctor, learn that you must now start at the beginning, reset your sleep apnea mouthguard back to the original neutral settings and start the adjustment process all over again, hoping to bring your sleep interruptions back down to the 20% mark, even though no one knows why things changed?

…. continue the slow process, week after week, painstakingly adjusting and testing the mouthguard, trying to improve your abysmal sleep, not sure if you will ever find the new perfect setting, but hoping to get the relief you so desperately desire?

You know that feeling when you….

…. lament that you are so gosh darn sleepy during the day?

.... would give anything for a good night's sleep?

You know that feeling?

Yeah, me too.

Best of luck with your sleep trials and tribulations.

Excuse me now while I go take a nap.